A professor friend used to explain the idea of chi to his Oriental philosophy students in this way:
There is the path and there is the ditch.
If you’re not on the path, you’re in the ditch.
If you’re doing your best to be who you are capable of being and doing the things that help you realize your potential, then you’re on the path. In terms of growth, if you’re growing and becoming a better version of yourself and a better person to the people in your life, then you’re on the path.
And yet, even when we’re committed to the path of growth, we can find ourselves sitting in the ditch!
It happens when we get stuck. Or lose motivation. We get in our own way and wound around the proverbial axle. Things become same-old, same-old. Our lives become smaller and duller. If we’re the authors of our own life, then this must be what writer’s block looks like.
When we find ourselves stuck in the ditch, the best way to get back on the path is to ask for a hand. In a real-world ditch, that means literally asking someone to extend a hand and to pull us up and back onto the path. In the world of the metaphorical ditch, the best helping hand is a new perspective.
While it is possible to find a new perspective on our own, it is very difficult…on par with clapping with one hand. As St. Augustine wrote, “The eye that I look for is the eye that I look with.” Or, more clearly though less memorably, it’s hard to find a new perspective when we’re using the same old eyes. What to do?
The solution should be obvious: Just as we’d use someone else’s hand, so must we use someone else’s eyes!
(Remember, this is a metaphor. One disturbingly full of body parts, but a metaphor nonetheless.)
Using someone else’s eyes means borrowing their perspective. Ask them, “What do you see when you look at what I’m dealing with?” We’re not asking for advice because this isn’t about should or ought…this is simply a matter of asking what they see.
No matter what they describe, it gives us a perspective we never could have had on our own because it did not come through our ‘eyes’. Their perspective, when added to ours, can give us a kind of binocular vision. If we allow it, this new view can change our world, showing us greater depth, detail, and possibilities than we were able to see by ourselves. .
We can take that almost magical gift and let it lift us back onto the path. We must be sure to thank the person who lent us a hand…and their eyes. And be ready to offer our hand and eyes to another as we continue down the path.
