It isn’t what happens to you that matters, but how you respond to it.
Epictetus
When we experience unexpected change, whether in our personal or professional lives, we tend to either resist or react.
Not all change should be embraced, but when we have little choice or we know the change can ultimately be good for us, we need to figure out how to view the change as an opportunity rather than threat. A big part of that is learning how to NOT react when change shows up…our goal is to go from REACTING to change to RESPONDING to it in a way that benefits us.
We can create space for ourselves by acknowledging the change as an opportunity, even if we don’t necessarily feel happy about it yet. The saying “Opportunity knocks” leads us to believe that it is always polite and waits for us to open the door. Change usually feels more like seeing Jack Nicholson’s face through a hole chopped in a door, announcing “Heeeere’s Johnny!” Being able to calmly recognize that change is upon us is a big deal. When we can say to ourselves, “Hey, look, change is here,” we’ve kept ourselves from ignoring the change as well as from having a knee-jerk reaction to it (like screaming and running away).
In the best case, we will have enough time to put together a careful plan for responding to the change. That puts us in charge! Sometimes change is so sudden that we don’t have time to plan before it is upon us. Even if we cannot plan before the change starts, we can always choose our response to it.
So a plan, if possible, even if we’re doing the planning as the change happens. And we carry out that plan, as best we can, adapting it as needed. When it’s all over and the dust has settled, it’s a good idea to review what happened and how we responded. Even though we may have felt off balance and unsure of ourselves at the time, by working to respond rather than react, we’ve probably managed to at least not make things worse! Better still, we can identify what kinds of opportunities the change brought with it. And best of all, by reflecting on how the change played out and how we responded, we strengthen our skills in adapting and growing. We can learn to embrace change as an opportunity to grow.
