Page 365 - Learning to Learn

LEARNING TO LEARN: BECOMING A SELF -GROWER 365
EXPERIENCE 12: U SING FAILURE AS A STEPPING STONE TO SUCCESS READING
their stress. No one is immune to life’s stresses, so developing some coping mechanisms to use during the
difficult times of your life will help you to meet stress head on and not let it knock you down.
Stress is caused by change in your life either good or bad, real or imagined. An example of a bad stressor
would be the death of a loved one or an illness; a good stressor would be a promotion on a job or a move
to a dream house. An example of a real change is a death in the family or the loss of a job; an imagined
change would be worrying if you will have enough money to pay your rent or worrying that you won’t be
able to get a job after you graduate. There are different types of stresses as well: emotional stresses, such
as a break up with a boyfriend or girlfriend or a fight with a parent; physical stresses, such as a bad cold or
a sports injury; overwork stresses, such as working more than 40 hours a week or pushing your body too
far while exercising; environmental stresses, such as a severely hot or cold day or air pollution; hormonal
stresses, such as puberty, pre-menstrual syndrome, or menopause; and allergic stresses, such as hay fever
or food allergies.
When people have too many of these stressors occurring at the same time, they can become overstressed.
When people are overstressed, they may experience physical and emotional symptoms, such as aches and
pains, fatigue, lethargy, sleep disturbances, gastrointestinal troubles, anxiety, depression, and panic at-
tacks. Therefore, it is important that people develop ways to cope with stress, and there are good and bad
ways of coping as well. Using drugs and alcohol to deal with stress is, of course, not the way to go. Nor
is ignoring the problem. A nutritional diet, aerobic exercise, consistent sleep habits, balanced work habits,
relaxation exercises, meditation, and yoga are good ways to relieve stress. You can also develop your own
particular tension relievers, such as playing with your dog, working in your garden, doing something artis-
tic (drawing, painting, writing, playing the piano, knitting, needle point, sewing, etc.), taking a walk each
night after dinner, participating in a sport, taking a hot bubble bath, relaxing with a good book or a good
friend, going window shopping, etc. The idea here is to live a life that is balanced so that you do not get
overstressed, to balance work and play and to develop healthy personal habits. Then when those changes
come that may cause extra stress, you will have the reserves to deal with them.
Table 1 breaks the “coping process” into ten stages that represent various aspects of coping. Each stage is
equally important although not all stages are necessary for every (coping) situation.
Sandra on coping: I have to say that I think I have accepted what happened
to me (my injuries) as just part of my life. I didn’t get dealt the hand I might
have wanted, and I do get frustrated when I have trouble hearing and following
conversations, but the situation is what it is. I watched a couple of friends
really beat themselves up with “what-Ifs” (what if our convoy had left five
minutes later, what if I’d been sitting in the next truck, etc.), and that’s a
bad place to be because you don’t get anywhere trying to rewrite the past.
I hate admitting it, but I think I need to work on having faith in people. I
sometimes feel like I have to do everything myself because it’s tough to
count on other people. This is where my family really helps, though. It’s
hard to not believe in the goodness of people when I’m around my niece.
I’m getting better at this, but it’s still a challenge.